Wednesday, December 3, 2008

GET OUTTA MY FACE


[Photo]Got up yesterday and forced myself out into the 26 degree torture. It was cold enough that the penguins were out. Just had 3 miles planned but it wasn't to bad. Then I did P90X Ab Ripper. Also did P90X Yoga today.
Mile 1 10:08
Mile 2 9:44
Mile 3 9:22
Total 29:15

Except for the penguins didn't much happen so I'll tell about the gnat in the restroom at work.


I was standing and relieving myself when this damn gnat wouldn't get outta my face. I waved at it, then swatted at it, and then tried to catch it. Of course while this is happening I'm peeing all over the toilet lid and floor. Then the little SOB gets right in my face again so I blow on it. It falls straight into the toilet and begins to splash around in the pee and water. Now I'm at least humane so I fought off the urge to pee on the poor little drowning nuisance. It splashed for a few seconds when suddenly it flew out of the pee and right back in my face again. Only this time it seemed to be back with a vengeance. This stopped my, by this time, trickling stream as now I had a pee coated pissed-off pest hell bent on who knows what to get even. Again I swatted and tried to wave it away without being able to kill it so I zipped up and got the hell out of there. Later at lunch I had to shew away another gnat----no way it was the same one----you think? Naw, no way.

4 comments:

Jill said...

Are gnats supposed to be "dog dick gnats" not human (insert word) gnats? Well, I'm not from the south...so I am not sure on this fact.

But anyway...I am glad you admitted to peeing on the seat. I have ALWAYS wondered WHO in the #%$**! was doing that!

And, I forgive you...since you were fighting another force.

Think your employer needs to get some pest control services!

Missy said...

What kind of talent do you have to have to pee on your own face? Go Michele! (I know it was through transference but really...)

Wes said...

You have disturbed the balance of the universe. Do a good deed to restore your karma. NOW :-)

Old Man and mid pack runner said...

what do you think abou the P90 stuff?